Is it okay for a Christian to get angry?

The short answer is no. Anger against one another is a sin. But it isn't that simple, is it? In the Old Testement there are numerous examples of anger and rage. In the New Testement we have the example of Jesus Himself being annoyed with the thick headedness (is that a word?) of the diciples.

Matthew 17:17 "You unblieving and perverse generation," Jesus replied, "how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy to me." Matthew 16:23 "Jesus turned to Peter and said, 'Get behind me Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns!"

In these two examples, we see Jesus reacting in exasperation in one, and anger in another. So clearly, there is a time for anger when dealing with the adversary. But what about each other? How are we supposed to show each other displeasure without anger?

There's a reason I'm asking, yesterday at work I had an argument with a coworker. There is no love lost between us, we are oil and water. I have attempted numerous times to open the lines of communication but he simply has no interest in any sort of friendship with me. To be perfectly honest, I'm not interested in friendship with him either. Aside from the 15 year difference in our ages, I'm a practicing Christian in recovery from alcohol (among other things), he's a 25 year old practicing drinker that lives very much like I did at age 25. We don't argue every day, more like every 6 months or so the tension builds up between us and something triggers it and BOOM! I never said I was the perfect Christian. Yesterday, it was foul language. Maybe you've noticed that most 20 somethings don't seem to think at all about blurting out profanity in a nonstop stream. It was happening and I've noticed it happens a lot with him. I said something to someone else nearby where he could hear very clearly, "f-ity f f f.." But I wasn't abbreviating or censoring the f word at all. That produced an immediate and expected reaction out of my coworker.

Was I right in doing what I did? No. Could I have handled it better? Absolutely. Is there anything I could have said to this particular person and not gotten a negative reaction out of him? No. But I certainly could have used a different tactic than what I did. I could have spoken to our immediate supervisor about how what he says in our warehouse is clearly heard by customers at our front counter. Our supervisor would have taken him aside, used his better attitude and better approach to talk to him about it and he would have had no idea that I was the one with a problem with his language. Now if I do that he will know precisely where it came from and will probably sulk and complain about me. Should this really concern me? No.

Ultimately, I realize that I set him up to blow up at me. I spurred him into anger through my own actions and that was wrong. In another time of my life, I would have complained about it to my wife and other coworkers. I would have talked about how immature he was and I would really have told this story to make myself out to be the victim of his anger. I can think of one person I actually did that with, too.

Those of you reading this post have walked with me through a revelation. When I began tonight, I hadn't even thought about how much of this was my own fault. I didn't realize just how manipulative I was. I deliberately got under his skin and pushed his animosity to the surface for my own purposes. I truly feel used by Satan himself. I feel like he figured out a way for me to sin in such a way that I could so easily blame someone else. It's the same for the temptation of that next drink, drug, infidelity, promiscuity. He knows our weaknesses better then we do ourselves and he uses them against us.

So, the short answer still fits. No, it is not okay for a Christian to get angry. I was angry at the foul language being used, and that opened me up to be used for the wrong purposes. In another time I would have complained while drinking a beer or a whiskey. I would have fumed at how this guy was just irrational and why couldn't he see what a nice guy I really am? Why can't we just get along while at work?

I see so clearly just what I did that caused this. This is the power of journaling. This is the reason I started this blog. Now I must ask for forgiveness from Jesus, and from my coworker. I'm not entirely certain how he will receive my request for forgiveness from him. I have absolutely no idea how I'm going to approach him. I've done such a good job pushing his buttons that he won't even look at me at work. This is certainly something I will pray on and I hope that anyone reading this will stop and say a quick prayer for me.

Take joy in the revelation that I've discovered this tactic that's been used against me by Satan. Pray that I remain on guard against the next attack and I keep Jesus on the forefront of my battle line. Pray that I remember the commandment "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength, and Love your neighbor as yourself"